Hana nara tsubomi no watashi no jinsei…

Huaahhh…akhirnya berakhir juga semester ini..walaupun banyak kejadian-kejadian gk enak selama 6 bulan ini tapi lumayan happy ending, hehe..Alhamdulillah, dalam hal nilai mungkin ini semester paling sukses selama berkarir dalam dunia perkuliahan

Yaah, tetapi ada 1 proker yang gk kesampean nih..iya gk, Van? (Alvan -red) kalo begitu dimundurkan sajalah ke semester berikutnya dan semoga dapat terselesaikan di semester depan, hehe..

Terimakasih buat semua yang udah membantu gw melewati semester ini sehingga dapat berakhir dengan baik..Buat Kus, Citra dan Angga, terimakasih udah menemani belajar selama ini, ayo semangat buat semester selanjutnya!

Oya, mulai besok sampe Sabtu depan bakal ada ekskursi, acaranya jalan-jalan ke perusahaan-perusahaan yang berhubungan dengan arus kuat gt, tapi aneh deh, hari Kamis rencananya mau ke Trans7 buat nonton 4 Mata trus hari Sabtu ke Dufaaaannn!!!! Yeah, mana gratis lagi

Yah, begitulah hidup gw saat ini…walaupun sepi tapi masih banyak hal-hal indah yang Allah berikan untuk gw nikmati dan syukuri..Sampai jumpa lagi di semester berikutnya..

Have a beautiful life!

Kanashimi no mukou kishi ni

Hohoemi ga aru to iu yo

"They say there is a smile on the other shore of sadness…"

Right now, I’m trying my best to believe that…

Wuihh…baru aja tadi selesai ujian Probstat bersama bapak Ng.S..kirain ini bener-bener akan menjadi ujian terkhir gw di semester ini taunya terakhir dia ngasih pengumuman kalo malam ini dia bakal periksa semua ujian trus yang masih gk lulus bakal ujian lagi BESOK pada waktu yang sama kayak tadi…

Kacau deh, pengumuman siapa yang lulus ato nggak pun bakal baru dikasih tau besok, jadi artinya harus menunggu penuh ketegangan lagi kayak tadi, huh…Untung aja tadi ada satu mata kuliah yang nilainya udah keluar dan Alhamdulillah bagus, jadi agak terhibur deh, hehe…

Oya, aside from all of those exams, gw baru aja beli CD The Corrs yang baru, judulnya Dreams (Ultimate Corrs Collection). Isinya lagu-lagu The Corrs yang dulu pernah hit dan lagu-lagu kompilasi mereka bareng Bono, The Chieftains, dan lain-lain..Menurut gw bagus sih, tapi karena kebanyakan cuma kumpulan lagu, kyknya gk terlalu worth the money nya deh (CD mahal sekarang, hiks…)

Trus buat Alvan, kalo lo baca ini (yang mungkin gk akan terjadi, hehe..) waktu itu gw bilang gw punya lagu buat lo tapi lo jijik karena lagunya dari cowok (gw normal kok,Van) jadi pada kesempatan ini gw mau kasih lirik yang berhubungan aja deh:

Namida koboshiatte naita yoru mo
Kudaranai hanashi de asa made waratta hibi mo
Wasurenai, ima no boku o sasaeru takara mono dakara…

I don’t forget those nights when I cried
And when we chat and laughed about useless things until morning
Those are treasures that support me right now…

Sori kalo jelek, tapi dapet maksudnya kan? Thanks for all those nights.. I’m over it…at last, I have completed my resolution..I hope that it won’t be shaken anymore..

Ok d, semuanya…good day! Go kigen yo

Kagirareta toki no naka de
Dore dake no koto ga dekiru no darou
Kotoba ni naranai hodo no omoi o
Dore dake anata ni tsutaerarerun darou
In such limited times
How much can I do?
Those feelings which I can’t put into words
How many of it can reach you?

Zutto tojikometeta
Mune no itami o keshite kureta
Ima watashi ga waraeru no wa
Issho ni naite kureta kimi ga ita kara
You’ve erased the pain inside my heart
That I had been hiding all along
The way I can smile right now
Is because you were there, crying with me

* Hitori ja nai kara
Kimi ga watashi o mamoru kara
Tsuyoku nareru, mou nanimo kowakunai yo
Toki ga nadameteku
Itami to tomo ni nagareteku
Hi no hikari ga yasashiku terashite kureru…
Because I’m not alone
Because you’re protecting me
I can become this strong and not afraid of anything anymore
Time soothes and flow with the pain
Sunshine gently shines the way…

Setsumei suru kotoba mo
Murishicha warau koto mo shinakute ii kara
Nanika aru nara itsudemo tayotte hoshii
Tsukareta toki wa kata o kasu kara
You don’t have to explain anything
Or force yourself to smile
If there is anything, I want you to rely on me
When you are tired, I will lend you my shoulder

Donna ni tsuyogattemo
Tameiki kurai suru toki mo aru
Kodoku ja omoi tobira mo
Tomo ni tachiagareba mata ugokihajimeru
No matter how strong you try to look
You must have at least sighed a bit
Eventough there is loneliness and heavy doors
If we stand againts it together, then we can start to move again

Hitori ja nai kara
Watashi ga kimi o mamoru kara
Anata no warau kao ga mitai to omou kara
Because you’re not alone
Because I’m protecting you
Because I want to see your smiling face

Toki ga nadameteku
Itami to tomo ni nagareteku
Hi no hikari ga yasashiku terashite kureru
Time soothes and flow with the pain
Sunshine gently shines the way

Toki ni hito wa kizutsuki kizutsuke nagara
Somaru iro wa sore zore chigau kedo
Jibun dake no Story tsukuri nagara ikiteiku no
Dakara zutto, zutto akiramenai de
Sometimes people are hurting others while being hurt
And even when the dyed colors are different
We make our own story while we live on
That’s why you should never, never give up

* repeat

Hehe, tadi tuh liriknya Story dari Ai..bagus juga kok, mengisahkan tentang dua sahabat yang saling mensupport gitu deh..sekali lagi maaf kalo translasinya kurang bagus mata  ne

Towa ni

Futari o
tsunagu ito ga

Mietara ii ne
to

Me o tojita
hohoemi o

Ima mo
oboeteru

I believe that it would
be nice if I can see the thread that bonds the two of us

And I still remember
the smile when I close my eyes

Katachi no
nai mono

nara

Koware wa
shinai to

Dakishimeta
nukumori ga nokoru yo

If it is something that
has no shape

I believe that it won’t
break

The hug’s warmth is
still left

Anata no kaze
ni natte

Subete o
tsutsunde agetai

Mune ni
hibiku koe ga

Sore wa towa
ni

Toki ga
tomaru made

I want to be your wind

And engulf everything
for you

The voice that echoes
in my heart

That is to eternity

Until the time stops

Aitakute
aenai yoru

Omoi o sora
ni hirogete

Tonde yuku
yo, soba ni iru yo

Onaji kimochi
de iru

nara

In the night where I
can’t meet you, though I want to

I spread my feelings
towards the sky

I will fly; I will be
by your side

If we have the same
feelings

Anata no kaze
ni natte

Subete o
tsutsunde agetai

Itsumo itsu
no hi ni mo

Sore ga boku
no kotae sa

I want to be your wind

And engulf everything
for you

Always, no matter when

That’s my answer

Anata no soba
de

Kaze ni natte

Tsutsunde
agetai

Tooku, anata
dake o

Towa ni

I want to be the wind
beside you

And engulf everything
for you

Far away, only you

Until eternity

Itoshii hito
yo…

My beloved…

Itu
lirik lagu Towa ni, yang dinyanyiin sama Ayaka dan The Gospellers di Music Fair
21. Gak tau sih sebenernya yang nyanyi siapa, hehe.. Lagu yang bagus, menurut
gw.. Towa ni sendiri artinya kira-kira to
eternity, maaf ya kalo terjemahan di atas agak kacau, susah soalnya

Ok
d, sampai ketemu lagi.. Hv a nice day!

If my love
life until now is like falling off from a cliff, then now I guess I’m at the
bottom of that cliff. I don’t know what to do anymore. This time I thought, “at
last I’ve found her”, but in the end she’s just like any other girl I liked before,
never liked me backL. 

Why does she
change? Or is it just me? Was she really
like this from the beginning? Is it
really just me daydreaming that at last maybe I met that someone? Why does she
suddenly act like that? Did I do something wrong? Or then again, I might’ve
misinterpreted everything like always.

Why am I
always like this anyway? It’s too easy for me to fall for someone while, on the
contrary, it’s like impossible for that someone to fall for me. In the end I
just keep getting hurt. If love, for me, means to be hurt then should I even
love someone?

I’m so jealous
with people around me. They are holding hands, giving presents, watching movies
together, studying together, and do all those stuff. When I go to mall and see
them like that, I can’t help feeling lonely. Why can’t I be like them? I’m
almost 19 and I’ve never had any girlfriend. Well, I know I’m not that good
with women, but…

Hehe, thoughts
like that keep swirling inside of me that sometimes I can’t even think of
anything else, pathetic, aren’t I? I always believe that I’m like this because
someday I will meet the one whom I can boast about, someone with whom I can be
happy, and because I’ve never had someone before, I’ll be really thankful for
her presence. Whenever I think about that,
I can be relieved a bit. I also believe that because the way I am right now is
not enough, because I have to make myself better all the time that up until
now, there is no one.

But, as time
goes by, I’m starting to doubt that. No, maybe doubt is not the right word; I
guess I’m starting to losing hope. I kept asking myself, “am I that bad”, or,
“is there really no good points in me?” I really have crisis of confidence, eh? What to do then?

“A fragile heart has broken before, I don’t
think it could endure another pain” is what Westlife said on their song,
“Fragile Heart” and I think I have that kind of heart. I can only wish that
someday there will be someone who will gladly accept me.BTW, my friend once
told me that somehow I will send him my wedding invitation; I guess I should
believe him and say, Amieeeeeennnn… J

For now, I
guess I’ll just enjoy my time at the bottom of the cliff, watching the
brilliant blue sky from down below. Someday I’ll put myself together and climb
the cliff with all my might, for I believe that sky is even more beautiful if I
saw it from above this cliff.

 Thanks for reading

-Caesario
Permana

Kesa, FS o aketa soshite kanojo no shoutbox o mita.
.
Hontou ni bikkuri shita yo, mou kawatta, kanojo no shoutout tte..

demo sono serifu wa boku no tame desuka?
Sou nara hontou ni kanashii yo..
Sore wa anata no henji shinai riyuu desuka? Boku nanka machigai demo shita no? Nande? Boku ja dame nano?
Aahh…Sore wa hontou ja nai nara, douka henji shite kudasai ne, matteiru kara…

Hehe, udah dulu deh posting kali ini, pokoknya lagi sedih banget udah ah, sekarang mau menenangkan diri  dulu terus "rencananya" nanti malem mau mulai blajar anum, soalnya bahannya banyak banget..

yasu, mata ne…

Huihh..akhirnya selesai juga UAS buat tahun ini, walaupun tidak diakhiri dengan cukup baik sih, hehe..
Buat yang besok masih ada UAS, semangat ya! kalian pasti bisa!

Udah dulu deh, gk jelas mau nulis apa…

"Kimi ga boku no mae ni arawareta hi kara

Nani mo kamo ga chigaku mietanda"

"Eversince the day you appeared in front of me

  Everything I see looked different"

Thank you for making my life more beautiful

Halo, pertama kali mencoba mem-post blog nih..
Besok udah UAS matel aja, tapi gk ada niat belajar sama sekali, hehe..
Jadi mau curhat aja nih…

Senshuu, tomodachi ga kiisasete kureta, kanojo wa ano toki hontou ni boku kara hanareterun datte… sugoku kanashii na. Sore wa kanojo wa boku no koto ga zenzen suki ja nai imi desu yo ne? Demo shikata nai wa, sonna koto..Boku wa akirameru shika nai..

Ma, sore wa mou mukashi no koto ni nasaseru tsumori dakedo, yappari ima made kanojo to deau to fuan ni naru yo..Ima wa dekiru dake kanojo no o aitaku mo nai yo..

Sore to ima wa boku mata suki na hito ga dekita yo..sugoku kirei de omoshiroi hito desu yo..Dakedo kanojo wa boku no koto nanka dou omou ka zenzen wakattenai desu yo..

Dou sureba ii ka? Futatabi kata omoi ni naru no ka na?

Ma, ii desu..Ima wa asu ni tachi mukaou!